Own The Room Bitch!

Provocative?  Controversial?  I hope so!  I’m bored with all these websites and blogs telling us how to look and feel more confident easily.  It all seems to be on the outside…lose weight, buy a new wardrobe, get botox, and the rest.  I’m not saying that these aren’t helpful ways to make you feel more confident but they’re on the outside and last until the next big thing comes along.  I want to know about stuff I can do with myself…inside, not something I have to buy to make myself feel better for a short period of time.  There isn’t a store that sells confidence, we can’t buy it really, it’s intangible…a feeling, a posture, a stance.

I’m sure you’ve heard the expression ‘fake it till you make it’.  So, does this mean we all go around pretending that everything is alright, with a plastic smile on our faces while feeling like a frightened rabbit inside?  I don’t think so.  I would replace the word ‘fake’ with the word ‘practice’…that feels better already.  None of us were born owning the room and some of us struggle with even walking into a room and looking people in the eye.  There’s actually quite a simple formula for feeling in control about walking into a new situation.  How’s your handshake?

Handshakes are funny things, even looking at the word makes me smile.  It sounds like you walk around with shakey hands!  Please don’t underestimate the importance of a good handshake.  Harvard and several other Universities in America just spent millions of pounds on a study about touch and how important it is in our lives.  I could have told them that and saved them a lot of money!  When we’re born, it’s all we’ve got.  Touch is the first sense we experience and we spend the rest of our lives finding new ways to experience that sense.  That’s why a good handshake is so important.  It speaks volumes to the other person and requires that they look at us when we shake their hand.  Wet, limp, hesitant handshakes say just that!  So sort out your handshake.  Practice it.  Not too soft, not too strong…just right.

Behave your way to success.  If you want to look and feel confident, take on a confident posture.  This can be as simple as putting more confidence in your walk and in your demeanour.  Swing your arms as you walk, this will give you better balance, project you forward, and create a confident appearance.  People unconsciously migrate towards people that make them feel good and confidence is magnetic.  The only disability in life is a bad attitude, so change your attitude and change your life!